Today I welcome Sarah Johnson to my blog! She has posted an excerpt from her latest novel, Cupid's Traps: A Matchmaker's Tale for our enjoyment. And there is also a giveaway - details below!
"William Shakespeare said it best when he penned, ‘Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps’. Georgiana Darcy, in her first matchmaking adventure, might need to call in a few favors from her family, or even Cupid himself, in order to pull off the perfect match for her brother, Fitzwilliam Darcy. He is truly smitten, but the lady, Miss Elizabeth Bennet, is not impressed with his character. Within the throes of Cupid’s traps, will she finally see that her heart is touched by this handsome gentleman before these traps force them into a union?"
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The four were so eagerly discussing the
awe-inspiring experience that they did not notice the latch on the door did not
fully catch when they left the cage.
Anne was compelled into a coughing fit, and
the next thing they knew, a flock of parrots flew overhead, squawking loudly,
with more coming out of the opened door.
A curdling scream came from the sitting
area, and all four rushed to find out what had happened. They were brought to a
stop immediately when they rounded the corner and saw Georgiana’s favorite
parrot sitting atop Lady Catherine’s head, firmly planted in her hair, while Mr
Collins’ flailing arms tried to fend off another persistent bird. Charlotte was
in such shock she watched on in stunned silence. Maria jumped into the fray and
tried to help her brother-in-law, but only succeeded in chasing him, and the
bird, in circles and making herself quite dizzy. The colonel was no help to
anyone as he was laughing so hard he was doubled over and nearly on the floor.
The four raced over and tried to help Lady
Catherine, but the squawking only increased as two more parrots joined in on
the attack. Anne was trying to remain composed and help her mother, but when Lady
Catherine’s prized peacock, which had always had full run of the solarium, came
running towards them, his tail feathers wide and on display for all to see, she
could control herself no longer and began to laugh just as hard as her cousin
Richard.
Georgiana joined Maria in trying to chase
off the parrot that was engaged in a game of tag with Mr Collins, leaving
Elizabeth and Darcy to battle the birds that were attracted to Lady Catherine’s
hair.
Servants were filling the room quickly, most
busily trying to find all the escaped birds to put them back into their
enclosure, though none dared step in to be hit by the flying arms of their
mistress, Lady Catherine.
Elizabeth tried to get the most annoying of
the parrots off of the grand lady, but his talon was stuck in her hair. Lady
Catherine was putting up such a fuss that Elizabeth was willing to do anything
to free the bird, so she pulled harder. What she thought was Lady Catherine’s
hair turned out to be nothing more than a wig, and the tugging made it come
off, exposing Lady Catherine’s bald head to all in the room.
The grand lady’s hands immediately went to
her head and her shrill voice filled the air as shrieks of ‘how dare you’ and ‘you will
pay for exposing me to such censure’ escaped her lips.
In her anger, Lady Catherine pushed
Elizabeth away, causing her to stumble backwards and right into Darcy.
Darcy was already stunned by the revelation
that his aunt had no hair, and when Elizabeth fell into him, he did not have
the wherewithal to do anything but grab at her falling form. His arms reached
around her in a most ungentlemanly fashion, and their feet became entangled,
causing both of them to land on the floor in such a manner as to send Lady
Catherine into shrieks once again, this time about the compromising position in
which Elizabeth now lay, sprawled out atop her nephew.
Every eye in the room now turned to the two,
and, in her haste to stand, Elizabeth caused the ties of her dress to become
caught on Mr Darcy’s coat button. She felt mortified and trapped. Scrambling to
get to her feet was not working and was only causing more problems.
Richard stepped in to lead his enraged aunt
from the room, followed closely by Mr Collins, who still flailed his arms about
trying to rid himself of the persistent bird, his loud voice booming his
concern to ensure the serenity of his patroness once again.
Anne rolled her eyes at the ridiculous man
and turned away to address the servants, ensuring the others were given some
privacy as Charlotte knelt beside her distraught friend, joined by Georgiana as
well.
Maria, not knowing what to do now that her
brother-in-law was not in the room, turned her attention to the two who lay sprawled out on the floor,
a wicked grin displayed on her lips as she thought of what fun her good friend
Lydia Bennet was missing. This was certainly something she would have to tell
in great detail!
Elizabeth was on her back, lying atop Mr
Darcy, who was amazingly still for such chaos surrounding them. As she looked
up to the ceiling above where birds still flew overhead, her eyes filled with
tears. What had happened to lead to such a situation?
Darcy was completely mortified at his own
actions, even if they were unintentional. When Elizabeth fell against him, his
arms flew around to catch her and his feet stumbled backwards, causing their
fall. But what was now so mortifying was where
exactly his hands had grabbed in his attempt. Being a well-sought after
gentleman, he had occasionally had a lady rub against his arm when he offered
his assistance, especially Miss Bingley. But he had long tried to remain as far
from those women as possible, for he did not wish to be put in such a position
as to be forced to offer his hand. Now here he was, being/acting the one whose
hands had grabbed so willingly, and with Miss Elizabeth as well! After all they
had both said today, this was certainly not going to help his plight. He tried
to remain as still as possible now, knowing that if he moved, he might
embarrass them both even more. Just her moving atop him was enough to cause his
heart to race. He had to focus on something else, so he chose, instead, to
think of the pain he felt at her elbow being in his ribs, hoping it would be
enough.
Georgiana and Charlotte both tried to undo
the knots that held the two entwined, but when it was clear something more was
needed, Georgiana ran off to get the scissors from her sewing box.
While they waited, Charlotte
assured Elizabeth it would be well, but the more she said the more distraught
her friend became. Finally she just chose to remain silent as they awaited
Georgiana’s return.
Soon the scissors were produced, and the
ties on Elizabeth’s dress were cut, allowing the two to stand once again,
though it was not so easy to accomplish as Elizabeth had to hold the top of her
dress.
When Elizabeth was once again on her feet,
Charlotte said, “I must go and find my husband now. Come, Maria,” she grabbed
her sister’s hand, pulling her out of the room.
Georgiana quietly added, “I will check on
Aunt Catherine,” and followed as well, leaving the two alone in the solarium.
Darcy removed his coat and draped it over
Elizabeth’s shoulders as he asked, “Are you injured?”
Elizabeth looked from the doorway back to
the man at her side, then down to the coat that now hung on her shoulders. She
reached her arms out into the sleeves and buttoned the front, folding the
lapels up and over the top portion of her dress. “It is only my pride that is
injured, sir.”
“I believe you once espoused that you dearly
love to laugh at follies and nonsense, and you even accused me of being without
them. Do you still feel as such?”
His tease was just enough to ease the
anxiety that had arisen in her chest. She pushed the sleeves of his coat up, a
laugh finally escaping her lips, “Certainly we both espoused much nonsense that
evening. I believe I was most shocked at your teasing Miss Bingley about her
figure being to the greatest advantage when we took a turn about the room.”
Darcy’s eyes grew dark, “It was not Miss
Bingley to whom I was referring when I made such a statement.”
Elizabeth looked up into his eyes, not
knowing what to say to such a statement. Could he have been admiring her all
those months ago?
Her thoughts were interrupted when her cousin
came storming back into the room, talking of the situation, followed by
Charlotte and Maria. He insisted they must leave, and Darcy watched as the four
gathered their belongings and left the solarium, Elizabeth still wearing his
coat. Once they were gone, he went to find his cousins and sister and see what
needed to be done about keeping the servants quiet after such an evening.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
** GIVEAWAY - ends Friday 17th of July**
Sarah has provided me with a giveaway with three lucky winners! I have an 2 ebooks (international) and one signed paperback (US only) of Cupid's Traps.
Sarah has provided me with a giveaway with three lucky winners! I have an 2 ebooks (international) and one signed paperback (US only) of Cupid's Traps.
To enter, leave a comment below and the winners will be picked randomly.
Please leave your email address and which draw you would like to be entered into (remembering the paperbacks are US only, but ebooks are international).
If you are one of the lucky winners, I will pass on your email to Sarah who will be in touch.
Good luck!
Thank you again to Sarah for this giveaway, and for the brilliant extract! I wish you all the best with this story and any future stories!
Your affectionate friend,
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteFunny excerpt! I'd love to win the book!
ReplyDeleteEither version is fine with me. If I must choose, I guess I'd choose the e-book. :-)
Thanks for the giveaway!
Pam
Pamh5230 at yahoo dot com
I still can't stop laughing! Thanks for the excerpt and the giveaway!
ReplyDeletetgruy at netscape dot net
That was a pleasure to read. Please enter me in the e-book drawing. Thank you!!
ReplyDeletejguthrie_@hotmail.com
This sounds like such fun! I would really love to have the PB version. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI could vividly picture the scene. I was laughing, too, as Mr. Collins' was running around with flailing arms and the parrot pulling off Lady Catherine's wig. Oh, yes, how will this be resolved. Is Elizabeth compromised? Thank you for the giveaway. I would like to entered for the paperback and ebook.
ReplyDeleteevamedmonds(at)gmail(dot)com
This story sounds too funny. Thank you for the giveaway. Either book is fine, but if I have a choice I would prefer the ebook. Integr67 at AOL dot com.
ReplyDeleteThat scene was certainly unexpected! So lively and exciting - can't wait until the book is brought to the big screen - it'll be such a great hit. And what a etiquette conundrum for Darcy - to choose between leaving Elizabeth in a state of undress and actually letting a lady see him in - gasp! - his shirtsleeves. Of course he gave her his jacket without a second thought. I'm international, so the ebook, please. beatriceyn at yahoo dot com. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing with us this wonderful excerpt, it was really funny!!!
ReplyDeleteI am international so enter me for the ebook copy.
My email chiarapiccirilla(at)hotmail(dot)it
Thanks for the chance to win! The E-book version is fine with me.
ReplyDeletesavedbyhisamazinggrace at gmail dot com
Please do not enter me as I just HAD to have this as soon as it was available. It is the sweetest of stories. Well done, Sarah, and best wishes for your launch.
ReplyDeleteLove the excerpt! Such a fun and chaotic scene and Lady Catherine bald? Looking forward to reading novel! Thank you for the giveaway. My email is tdungnvu (at) yahoo (dot) com
ReplyDeleteThis excerpt was hysterical! And a bald Lady Catherine to boot. Looking forward to reading more. Thank you for the generous give away. I'd like to be entered for the paperback. skamper25 (at) gmail (dot) com
ReplyDeleteGenius! I could just picture the scene on film. Such truly Janian style, writing with brilliant humour. I would love to win the e-book. carrieppm(at)gmail(dot)com
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like it will be one of her greatest novels so far. I would have loved to have witnessed Aunt Catherine's face when Elizabeth pulled the wig off. That would have been hilarious. What a thrill Darcy got when Lizzy wound up on top of him.
ReplyDeleteLove begins ln a different light. What does the future hold? I would love to be entered for the signed copy. Thank you for the generous give aways.
This excerpt really teased me to know more of what happened next. I hope Elizabeth accept Darcy's hand because she loves him and not to save her reputation. Thanks a lot for offering the giveaway, Sarah. And Sophie, please enter me for the e-book as I'm international.
ReplyDeleteevangelineace2020(at)yahoo(dot)com
Love this excerpt - Would love to know what led up to it and what follows. Thanks for the giveaways I would love to win an e-book please. glyniswhitelegg@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteHaha! Sounds like a very fun story! Thanks for the chance to win a copy! E-book for me as I'm international.
ReplyDeletenewyorkgirl82(at)gmail(dot)com
I would love to win the paperback. Love the concept, can't wait to read it.
ReplyDeletemarcia.g.vasquez(at)gmail(dot)com
Oh my! This is a must read! Love the excerpt. Thank you for the giveaway!
ReplyDeleteCherringtonmb at sbcglobal dot net